Hey, all! I have no idea if this marks my triumphant return, or if this is just a quick hop back in and then right back out, but this comic came to mind nearly fully-formed, and I couldn’t NOT share it with you. Hope you like it, and if you do, please re-share, re-tweet, or otherwise socialize the heck outta this thing.

Hi, friends–

These sorts of messages inevitably seem to start with something like, “After a great deal of soul-searching, I’ve decided to…” So, rather than go with the cliché, I thought it might be better to say: After consulting with my Magic 8-Ball, a discount Ouija board (it leaves off the vowels, cause most of them for ghosts are “Oooooos”), and one of those decision-maker things you make out of a piece of lined paper in grade school, I’ve decided…absolutely nothing.

But for the time being, Zoidland is going on hiatus. Y’see, the fact is, I’m out of time and finding myself scrambling every week to fit everything in. I started this strip over 8 years ago with one express purpose: To make my wife, the Eponymous Neaner, laugh. I’m pretty sure I’ve succeeded in doing that once or twice. And right now, I’ve also got The Social Life of Frank Linh and The Ouro Bros and the Neverending Tour (links to the right) to continue that, as well as Gloaming Gap as a creative outlet. Additionally, I understand that for those of you who appreciate Jane’s point of view on politics, the environment, TV, and general geekery, she occasionally uses The Twitter to tweet or however the kids say that.

To my readers, I thank you for riding along with me for all this time. This may not be the end of the road, but I think it’s a good place for a rest stop. So, go ahead, get out and stretch a little. Maybe check out the vending machines. …Wait, did I just trade one cliché for another? Nuts.

Thanks again, all.
–Jeff

This has been a baffling year for the presidential wanna-bes contenders. I still haven’t quite figured out why most of the GOP seems to be playing, “Who do we like better than Romney this month?”, other than to point out the obvious fact that apparently, they really don’t like Romney. Gingrich’s vow to run a positive campaign lasted all of what, eight seconds? before he started attacking the others. Rick Perry’s collapse in the polls is one thing, but his insistence that he’s still in it to win? Things just keep getting weirder and weirder. Anybody have any insight?

Tonight’s comic came out of a real-life conversation I had this evening with my family. (Yes, I was the nerd in this case.) My son resolved that he was going to listen to his mother and me more often. He asked me what my resolution was. I responded, but I don’t think he heard it.

Oh, no, wait, I said, “I think I might have resolved to give more clear answers. From time to time. Maybe.” I love being a Dad.

Fortunately, this has never been the case for my roleplaying games. Although I recently learned that nearly all of my current DM’s NPCs are based on characters from various anime series. After attempting to describe the physical appearance of my cleric, he likened him to “Abel Nightroad” from Trinity Blood. I have no idea who the guy is, nor had I ever heard of the series before, but given the pictures I’ve seen, dang if the guy wasn’t right.

Oh, yeah. Theoretical scientists? Pshaw. Everyone knows that artists are the real fruitcakes when it comes to gift-giving. Heck, it was probably an artist that invented fruitcake, for that matter. What was the worst gift you ever received? For that matter, what was the worst gift you ever gave? Let us all make fun of you know in the comments!

I told you I had more ideas in this storyline; and I’m not done yet!

Really hope you guys enjoyed this one, ’cause I’ve got a whole mess of similar jokes bouncing around my head, just in time for the traditional Northern Hemisphere Winter Solstice Festival-o’-Capitalism. Enjoy!

Imagine my shock and surprise when I found out that not only was last year’s “Cyber Monday” the biggest online shopping day ever, but that early estimates were saying that this year could be a 15% increase over that! I’m afraid that I’m going to have to issue a mea culpa to my students in one of my classes, as I was very much in Jane’s position, here. Changing pedantry sucks, I tell ya.

Anyone else loudly disparage something, only to find out that you were not just wrong, but really, really wrong later on? If so, any tips on how to withstand the shame and humiliation?

I have a disturbingly high amount of commercial jingles, tag lines, and mottos stuck in my head. I’m fairly certain that I drive family and close friends (not to mention proximal acquaintances) to near madness by pulling them up immediately after hearing a word from one of them. This also includes regular speech from game shows. To wit:

• Ah, yes, that bell means that time is running out in the round. I’ll give the wheel a final spin. Vowels are worth nothing, and consonants are worth…
• This is Bob Barker reminding you to help control the pet population. Have your pets spayed or neutered. Goodbye, everybody.
• Jeopardy! is a Mark Goodson Television Production.

…and so forth. Anything like this stick out for you guys?